Time, World Weariness and the Search for Fulfillment


No thing lasts forever, which is why it is so important to create an immunity within one’s Self to the siren call of attraction and desire. Not an immunity based upon rejection or supression of feelings, for such only builds up negative karma and has to be released eventually. An immunity based upon the decision to cultivate non-attachment in search of that Shangri-La of all Seekers, the Cessation of Desire.

Earthly attachments really take up all of our attention. The friends, the children, the lovers, the jobs, the recreation. All of it dominates our thinking, holds the primary position in our thoughts of the future and our considerations of the past.What gets lost in all of this is the Present, of course, and the state of the body and soul in the moment. And, being so forgotten, both suffer. The Body gets fat and sluggish and the Soul withers as the Ego dominates the internal conversation, relegating the Self to the position of Observer only.

Sometimes, while thinking, I stop. Allow the mind chatter to cease and to experience the moment in all of its purity. Inevitably, a thought arises as I see a bird fly by, or hear someone’s voice, and that thought begs for attention, for the Ego’s concerned nodding and sympathizing, because, without it, thought dies a wispy, untraceable death. Since we have been conditioned by our environment and those around us to ‘think like them’ our Egos do as they have been trained and focus their attention upon continuing the thought process by adding another thought, then another and then another in the logical and rational processes of induction or deduction, which are supposed to reflect the ‘natural’ way that the mind works. We are told that this is right and exact, right? That thinking is the key to intelligence and to success. Cogito Ergo Sum, I Think, Therefore I Am.

Those of the spiritual nature know that this is not true. Thinking obscures the I AM. Thinking relegates the I AM to a subsidary role, and WE ARE without thinking. WE WERE before thinking. WE WILL BE after thinking. Subjecting ourselves to the deprivations of Time is a choice, the I AM being ALL THAT I AM and I AM THAT I AM encompasses all of Creation beyond Time and Space and beyond the framework of all that we can consider, rationally, with the mind. What lies beyond the mind cannot even be fully considered with the mind because the mind is a tool; a limited tool that is meant to serve the greater Self which is the Soul. There is no place for intuition or the recognition of the speech patterns of the soul in the rational processes of the right-brained predominance of societal and cultural production, which acts to limit our conception of what is proper thought and behavior during our lifetimes.

Getting caught up in Time is so easy. Wanting, desire, the things of this world are so shiny and beckon the attention, drawing thought like food draws flies. The pretty girl, the handsome boy, the shiny diamond, the powerful car, the beautiful house, the verdant island all evoke feelings of desire as we seek to assuage that within us that segregates, that sees all without as separate from what is within. All things manifest in Time and Space. A thought held at one point in Time, depending upon its strength, maifests in Space at the point of its fullness. The Law of Attraction states this clearly and it follows that that which is supposed to happen, to manifest in one’s life, will do so while that which is not will not. This is true of people, of things, and of events.

Many are familiar with the old, hoary chain mail, a Reason, a Season or a Lifetime. People are in our lives for periods which correspond to these designations. What is usually not considered in this email is the Space that corresponds to the Time. And, that Space is not always physical space. Many times, it can be cultural space, mental space or spiritual space. As we grow and evolve, people move into and out of our lives depending upon who we are at a specific place in our lives. Our intellectual, philosophical and spiritual belief systems draw others of like mind and inclinations, and we resonate within each other’s spheres of influence and intention, shining like stars as we build and destroy seeking the Knowledge of Eternity.

When those relationships change, or end, it is usually for an excellent reason. One person grows while the other does not. The space which had been shared becomes too small for this growth and both leave it, or one stays. The decision to cultivate non-attachment then becomes an option for the person tending toward the higher planes of existence, an opportunity for one to seek the Greater Love which allows one to continue to feel the same love as before, but in a more expansive and freeing manner that wishes the best for the other person without holding on to them as if they were an anchor in the Sea of Life. Being tossed about in the waves and currents gives rise to fear, which then leads to entrapment within Time, and then attachment. Losing those attachments, then, releases us again, into the buffeting discourse of stimuli and we seek solace from that feeling of being overwhelmed by seeking someone else to attach to, led by the vagaries of want and desire.

We lose the ones we love – in the way we want to love them, at least – without fail, or the relationship changes beyond our desire for that change to occur. Everything changes, that is a constant, while our Ego attempts to keep things the same, and under its control. Our ability to keep up with that change and not hold on to old modes of thought, ways of being and relationships depends upon our ability to cultivate non-attachment and continue moving forward without holding on to what has become memory and regret. To become, truly, dispassionate, requires us to let go of both happiness and sadness. Both extremes create karma and yet it seems unavoidable as we go through the throes of emotional turmoil, convinced that our feelings of happiness are the end all be all of stability, not recognizing that we cannot have happiness without sadness and that both are extremes on a scale that should be balanced, somewhere in between. Becoming world-weary can be the result of living life in the emotional extremes, as mood swings and changes reveal the futility of living in the world, fully immersed in the search for fulfillment, when such fulfillment cannot be found in the finite world of the five senses.

But the deeper currents of that ocean must be explored by each of us individually, as they cannot be described adequately using words. Stillness, movement. Joy, and bright knowing. Beyond the attraction that we experience as a partial fulfillment of worldly love is that Greater Love that fills us to the brim in moments when we flow over, our joy and sadness mixed to become something greater and transcendent. Tears mix with laughter and the sensitivity of the spirit becomes an awareness and an awakened sense of empathy and compassion that makes the slightest emotional experience a possibility to cultivate Oneness.

Becoming immune to desire, ceasing to desire opens space in duality for Oneness to shine through as the Ego steps back, its needs subordinate to the evolution of consciousness. Desire creates separation, the illusion of pain when what one desires becomes lost, an opportunity for the Ego to regain its control. Constantly seeking to remove those opportunities then occurs through mindfulness, being aware of ones flow of thoughts constantly, and working consciously to sublimate them to the flow of moments, staying, constantly, in the Now.


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